Consumer Guide for Feb.-Mar. 2007
By Robert Christgau Special to MSN Music
Writing bimonthly, pondering design issues, ditching the annual Turkey Shoot
and, most of all, irritated if not appalled by all-too-many records with reps,
I've adjusted the Consumer Guide for MSN Music. So on page two you will find two albums marked Dud of
the Month, with the more notable dud listed first. Politically correct coot that
I am, I regret that both feature young women. Believe me, the young men will get
theirs, and there are coots aplenty waiting in the wings.
Beyoncé "B'Day" (Sony Urban Music/Columbia)
If opulence can signify liberation in this grotesquely materialistic time, as
in hip-hop it can, then Beyoncé earns her props with a bunch of songs she says
were inspired all in a rush by her "Dreamgirls" character. Many suspect they were
actually inspired by Jay-Z, who has the noblesse oblige to save the only
expression of erotic longing on the record. I don't. But I admire her for
opening the possibility, which leaves Hova with his hands full whether he's a
thousand miles away or getting one-upped on "Upgrade U." Not counting "Irreplaceable," where hook subsumes meaning anyway, the key
track is "Suga Mama," which ends with Beyoncé ordering her boy toy to
remove the duds she just bought him -- real slow. On most of them she's wronged
yet still in control because she's got so much money.
Grade: A minus
Lily Allen "Alright, Still" (Capitol)
In a no-frills voice that carries a tune as easily as a schoolkid carries a
backpack, the 21-year-old daughter of performing arts professionals plays a girl
sticking up for herself, creating an illusion of the ordinary that seems as
simple and inevitable as punk without punk shock and/or rage. Just to help out,
her well-attuned producers pretend that ska was a basic pop component in an era
not yet lost. Only two songs ring false: the one about her ex's penis because
everybody lies about that, and the one about keeping it real because all the
21-year-olds sing that tune -- and because she isn't real, really.
Grade: A minus
Clinic "Visitations" (Domino)
Though you'd never know it from the weary complaints of Alternian ADD
victims, Clinic's albums don't all sound the same. They do sound similar --
Clinic are minimalists. But like most minimalists, they try out new effects, and
especially for those put off by Ade Blackburn's lockjaw, the variations in
texture and rhythm here add jam to a garage-punk revival that's more solid than
the Strokes'. I still prefer 2004's disreputable "Winchester
Cathedral." But this is a proper guitar fix nevertheless.
Grade: A minus
Clipse "Hell Hath No Fury" (Zomba/Star
Trek/Re-Up Gang)
The rapping is crystalline, gritty -- that is, hard two ways. The only reason
"Momma, I'm so sorry, I'm so obnoxious" isn't the theme is that they're not
sorry. Playing hit rappers forced by evil bizzers to return to a life of crime,
so that music is just pocket money for them, they're unflinchingly
unsensationalistic. But it's the beats that turn this into noir worthy of Jim
Thompson, far from the stolen fun of the "We Got It for Cheap" mixtapes. Anyone
who associates the Neptunes with suave keyboard hooks won't believe they're
behind all this spare alienation. So what if "Mr. Me Too" contains a portion of
the composition "Burrup, " written by Cegricia Hamilton and Gary Henderson?
Meaning that buzzing dub thing? Or is it ringing? OK, vibrating. Et cetera.
Grade: A
Ornette Coleman "Sound Grammar"
(Sound Grammar)
Looking back, we understand that Coleman was always an inspired melodist. We
may even conclude that it was his melodies that made his free, harmolodic and
avant-funk concepts irresistible. But at 76, he turns the page with this
two-bass, two-Coleman quartet. Tony Falanga bows most ballad themes and is
hornlike or maybe just cellolike throughout. Ornette's alto (though not his
trumpet or violin) could also be described as cellolike, and his new
compositions suit the mellow mood even when the arrangement gives Denardo
Coleman room to bash and rumble. Exemplary is one of just two remakes: 1959's
"Turnaround," which was a lowdown gutbucket blues on "Tomorrow Is the Question"
but is a whimsical chamber-music blues here. Both times Ornette quotes Cole Porter's "Do I Love You"; here he also quotes Stephen Foster's "Beautiful Dreamer." Conceptually as major as "Change of the Century" (1959) or "Of Human Feelings" (1979)
and almost as consummately executed.
Grade: A
Lupe Fiasco "Lupe Fiasco's Food &
Liquor" (Atlantic)
Why do so many rappers of the everyday come from Chicago? Fiasco follows Common, Capital D, Rhymefest and of course his homey Kanye West, who is definitely part of the explanation. Though
I wish the beats were less corny-orchestral, Fiasco marks his own turf in a
three-song sequence that would have led the second side back in the day. The
not-quite-nightmarish "Daydreamin'," the thug-life-after-death fable "The
Cool" and the free-accelerating "Hurt Me Soul," which begins with Too Short calling women bitches and ends in the geopolitical
sinkhole we all inhabit, prove it isn't just realists who describe real life.
And the two takes on his signature "Kick Push" hope that everyday life isn't always a sinkhole.
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